Last Updated on May 11, 2025 by Cindy Benezra
In life, we all carry our unique burdens from the past—experiences that shape us for better or worse. While these memories and events can be significant, holding onto them can hinder our growth and happiness. If you are seeking areas in your life to move on from, this guide will provide practical steps to aid you in your journey of letting go.
It’s a Process, Not an Event
First and foremost, understand that letting go is not something you achieve overnight. It is a gradual process that requires patience and persistence. Being kind to yourself during this period is crucial. It’s perfectly okay to take your time.
The process of letting go of childhood abuse has been a journey that I have been on since childhood. There have been seasons where I feel I have healed completely, only to realize through a life event that there was more healing to be done. I’ve come to accept that this is normal and part of being human. We are on a journey to becoming our best selves, and that lasts our entire lives!
Practice Self-Compassion and Forgiveness
Holding onto past mistakes, regrets, or grudges can be incredibly draining. Practicing self-compassion and forgiveness towards yourself and others involved is essential for healing. Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting or excusing the harm done but freeing yourself from the heavy burden of bitterness and resentment.
Guilt and shame are immense weights that will keep you down if you allow it. The weight of guilt and shame from my past affected many aspects of my life for many years. It wasn’t until I sought therapy and learned to practice self-forgiveness that I could truly find momentum moving forward. This transformation allowed me to live more freely and joyfully.
Focus on the Present and Future
Living in the past can prevent you from fully experiencing the present or planning for the future. By shifting your focus to the here and now, you open yourself up to new opportunities and experiences that can bring joy and fulfillment.
Focusing on the present and future doesn’t mean the past is forgotten, but it does mean looking forward with anticipation that the future holds beautiful new opportunities that are worth seeking out.
Seek Support
You don’t have to go through this alone. Lean on friends, family, or professional counselors who can offer guidance and support. Having a solid support system can make a world of difference in your healing process.
When you walk closely with others, you realize quickly that we all have a part of our past that we are working on letting go of. Understanding this helps to normalize the process of letting go and leaning on each other for support.
Engage in Joyful Activities
Participate in activities that bring you joy and a sense of new beginnings. Whether it’s picking up a new hobby, traveling, or simply spending time with loved ones, these activities can help you build a brighter, more fulfilling future.
Cooking and baking have been therapeutic activities that have brought me joy through some of life’s most difficult transitions. The time creating something that smelled and tasted beautiful and brought immediate joy to others also filled me up. While it has currently taken a bit of a back burner to other activities, finding activities that bring happiness, even for a season, is so powerful.
Journaling and Mindfulness Exercises
Journaling can be a powerful tool for acknowledging and releasing emotions tied to your past. Similarly, mindfulness exercises can help you stay grounded and focused on the present moment, fostering inner peace and clarity.
Sometimes, writing down painful experiences can feel scary because you are faced with words of events that are often only stored in the mind and body. But as scary as it may seem, journaling can provide a unique kind of release. Coupled with mindfulness to ground you in the present, these two practices are powerful and cost nothing.
Conclusion
Moving on from the past is a challenging yet transformative journey. Remember that it’s okay to take your time and seek support when needed. By practicing self-compassion, focusing on the present and future, and engaging in joyful activities, you can create a fulfilling life free from the shadows of your past.
